#and I do say this as a daughter from an abusive household and specifically dicey relationship with their mother | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

arihi · 2 years ago

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On my bullshit again but I still maintain the (once again very bastardized and westernized) idea of ‘healing’ a la “you don’t owe anything to anyone” and “cutting people off is maintaining healthy boundaries” is a brain rot and people are so caught up in their moral superiority of [have had a single thought of introspection at least once] they don’t realize how black and white and inconsistent these ideals are

#again it’s like debating the concept of something instead of the something #people far removed from the messiness of actual relationships theorizing on impossible perfect practices and states #or alternatively people terrified of that messiness and trying to use a universal rubric #not to get too weirdly deep into this but like #what a weird carceral mentality to have!!!#like relationships and social interactions are measurable #sorry this does tie back into EEAAO bullshit hahaha #but seeing people call it JUST a feel good movie tells me our values might not align #is it a feel good movie because they dared to try to be hopeful about a continued relationship?#what was the ‘right’ ending then? Evelyn is never allowed to interact with her daughter again? Is that the ‘fair’ end state #how heartless!!#and I do say this as a daughter from an abusive household and specifically dicey relationship with their mother #Evelyn chose her and Joy chose her back and they’re trying to make a messy hurtful relationship hurt one another a little less #Evelyn isn’t ‘rewarded’ by a continued relationship with Joy #the entire movie was about them communicating their mutual desire to try and understand each other #and in the end they still don’t really not fully #but they’ve committed to try #Evelyn was shit about Joy and that is a fact and it’s something she continually faces over the movie #does that mean she’s never allowed to try to reconcile #it wasn’t ‘my generational trauma excuses my behavior towards my daughter’#it was ‘i have been faced with the hurt I’ve inflicted on my daughter and holy shit I’m also a broken person’#I felt like the movie showed Evelyn trying to reconcile but also giving Joy that option to not take it. As would be her right #but she does take it. Because she ripped apart universes to try and find a mother that would understand her #and despite the entire many worlds she still wants that #even if it hurts the both of them and it makes them feel like even smaller pieces of shit #because in the end they would rather experience those short happy moments with each other than without #and I think EEAAO is a great movie about the messiness of these relationships #anyway I can’t put a FULL media analysis in the tags and I’ve already tagged enough lol #but I will literally never run out of things to say about it #I tried to type more but Tumblr said you get 30 tags and then you need to shut up lol

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